I will never forget the moment I realized I was going to be a Mom. I wish I could say it was a day full of joy, wonder and rejoicing. But it wasn’t. A child conceived in violence. It was a day full of anguish, fear, even anger. I spent the whole 8 months of my pregnancy feeling like there was a dark cloud hanging over me, just going through the motions of living. I wasn’t sure I would ever be able to breathe again, ever be able to enjoy the sunshine again.
I woke up on November 25th, 2005, the day after Thanksgiving, and headed to the doctor for a routine doctors appointment, my 35-36 week visit. It was just a few short hours and an emergency C-section later, that they laid a tiny, wide wake and alert, 4 pound 15 ounce bundle into my arms. I remember looking down into this tiny face, gazing down into those solemn eyes, trusting me, loving me, and suddenly, I could feel the air hit my lungs. The dark cloud broke and sunshine came streaming through, the birds were singing, and air was crisp, and I was back among the living. This tiny miracle bundle of humanity had given me a reason to move forward again, a reason to live again.
I hear so many people say, if they could go back and change the past, they would. I have to say, that if I had a chance to go back into my past and change anything about it, I would leave it just like it is. It formed me into the woman, mom, Christian and wife I am today. And it gave me one of the most perfects gifts I’ve ever been blessed with, a bouncing baby boy. He was the beginning of so many good things that has happened in my life. I probably never would have married my husband if not for him, and so would not have been blessed 4 additional miracle babies (because let’s face it, all babies are miracles!)
So all that to say, happy 11th birthday to you Dalton. My oldest babe, my miracle, my blessing from heaven. I am so thankful that God allowed me to be your mother, and gave Daddy and I the privilege of raising you. I am so proud of the brilliant, talented, capable and caring young man you are becoming. May you ever put the Lord first in your life, because with Him guiding your path, you can and will move mountains!